Microsoft Bing gets its chance to become a novelist—and politely declines.
In previous posts I asked ChatGPT and Google Bard to write novels for me.
Now it was Microsoft Bing‘s turn.
Since I’d already gone around with ChatGPT and Bard giving me summaries of stories instead of actual stories, I decided to be up-front about what I wanted from Bing.
Bing’s reply was similarly straightforward.
Credit where credit is due. At least Bing “knows,” unlike ChatGPT and Bard, that a real novel just isn’t happening here. I can respect that.
While early versions of Bing happily lied to users about anything and everything, in its current incarnation, Bing started out surprisingly humble here.
But can it write? The answer is … about as well as ChatGPT and Google Bard.
In other words, Bing summarized what could in theory one day become a cliched but competent fantasy novel if one were to follow up by putting in the work of actually writing it.
Here are all 450 words of Bing’s first draft of The Quest of the Crystal Sword.
It did warn me. (More discussion follows the story.)
The Quest of the Crystal Sword
Lila was a young mage who dreamed of becoming a hero. She had always admired the stories of brave adventurers who fought evil and saved the world. She wanted to be like them, but she knew she was not strong enough or skilled enough to join them.
One day, she heard a rumor about a legendary weapon hidden in the depths of the Dark Forest. It was said to be a sword made of pure crystal, imbued with powerful magic. Whoever wielded it could defeat any enemy and become the greatest hero of all time.
Lila decided to go on a quest to find the crystal sword. She packed her belongings, took her trusty staff, and set off for the Dark Forest. She was not afraid of the dangers that lurked there. She was determined to prove herself and fulfill her dream.
Along the way, she met many friends and foes. She befriended a talking cat named Milo, who claimed to be a prince cursed by a witch. She fought against a band of goblins who tried to rob her. She helped a fairy village that was attacked by a giant spider. She learned many secrets and mysteries about the Dark Forest and its inhabitants.
She also faced many challenges and trials. She had to cross a river of fire, climb a mountain of ice, and solve a riddle of a sphinx. She had to overcome her fears, doubts, and weaknesses. She had to grow stronger, smarter, and braver.
Finally, she reached the end of her journey. She found the entrance to an ancient temple, where the crystal sword was hidden. She entered the temple, ready to claim her prize.
But she was not alone.
She encountered a dark figure, cloaked in shadows. It was the Dark Lord, the most evil and powerful being in the world. He had also heard about the crystal sword, and he wanted it for himself.
He challenged Lila to a duel for the sword. He said he would spare her life if she surrendered it to him. He said he would kill her if she refused.
Lila did not hesitate. She refused to give up the sword. She refused to let the Dark Lord have it. She refused to let him destroy the world with it.
She fought him with all her might.
She used her magic, her staff, and her wits. She dodged his attacks, countered his spells, and struck back with her own. She fought with courage, determination, and hope.
She fought for her dream.
She fought for her friends.
She fought for the world.
She won.
She defeated the Dark Lord.
She claimed the crystal sword.
She became a hero.
Well, that was easy.
But wait! Bing offered me some more choices when the story was through.
So I asked Bing to add more details.
But it turned out adding more details mostly meant simply adding to the list of plot points, rather than expanding them much. Bing’s second draft included mention of Lila fighting a band of attacking goblins, rescuing fairies from a giant spider, crossing a river of fire and a mountain of ice, and answering a sphinx’s riddles–all in the same summarizing style.
I tried to be more specific about the types of details I was looking for.
Once again, Bing laughed at me. Then it told me to go write my own story.
And it meant it.
Our creative differences were clearly too great to overcome. So Bing and I dissolved our partnership, wished each other well, and went our separate ways.
I wish it the best of luck in all of its future endeavors. 😅