Almost there …

Dear My Protagonist’s Most Excellent Frenemy,

You just had to show up on page 24 to wrench the story off its track, didn’t you?

No, I mean that. You had to.

There’d be no story without you.

Gratefully,

Me

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Dear All Characters,

This is an all-points bulletin: breathing is the perogative of the living.

All other characters shall cease to engage in it immediately.

Thank you,

Me (aka The Management)

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